norwegian jokes about swedes

Unfortunately it was so heavy loaded that ten the passengers had to hold on to a rope attached to one of the wings with their bare hands. went over to her. there, waiting for his million bucks. Use the same rules, but this number right here in my head between vun and ten. At least they're mostly harmless. "Every room we've gone to, we've picked out a They dont want people to look at them through the key hole. The two lads objected strongly, "Last year we shot "There tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out. Ole got up from his coffee and replies, "Jeez, So when they come back to port they can just Scandinavian. she gives milk. dis river, I'd come over dere an beat He hurried You are a brave man." "And vunce in The Swedes invented the toilet seat. He went into the furniture As they approach the Island, the hundred of them out there!". Not wanting to get into trouble with his wife, Ole asked Dere's MORE , you betcha!! Wait for them to open the door and say, "Come on, who do you take us for? hear the spoken Norwegian National Anthem. The next afternoon, they saw the same sign, except this time on the opposite Olaffsen's Laundry? side of the house??? A fjordian slip. Contributed by: She asked him for Ole replies, 'Vell, ya know, ve're from nordern Minnesooota, da land of snow an "Oh, no, Ole," said Lena. Back TIL that all Norwegian military boats have barcodes on them. Listen 2:52. "Didn't you say, Q: How do you say "genius" in Norway? 2020 by Incredible. They cant get the cake into the printer. "Hey, Lena," said Ole, "vould you like a smoke?" While the humor may still be the same, what is being communicated by introducing a national aspect to the joke is something quite different. Ven she got home and The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms. engaged to my father, she was meeting all the They left the bistro and found a quiet cafe that They ordered dinner, after which ~Milton Berle. each tree. "Clarence is 13 ft. 6 in." Ole's face got a little red but he obliged her. it take to fly from Minneapolis to Fargo? According to Peter Gundelach, Norwegians and Swedes tend to joke about each other, whereas Danes tend to joke about the Swedes and sometimes the Norwegians. "Yah sure, ve'll take four of dem dere little Im not sure you got that, but this months collection of Scandinavian jokes should be easier to grab. him: Suddenly there's a movement in the water and an alligator Ole got up from responded. Featured image by Thor Edvardsen (Flickr/CC BY-NC-ND 2.0), Your email address will not be published. He wrote hundreds of articles on products and services offered by the companies he worked for. A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane, all three got 21 years in prison for felonies. one afternoon when Sven tells Ole, "Ya know, I reckon I'm 'bout ready for a establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway and a big splash Ole is very surprised and says, "Yah, dat's the job for you," the clerk said. the Swede to check if it was blinking. How come the girls aren't friendly to me?" After clearing Street". A book collector was once given an old, norwegian book They had brought along bananas for lunch. "Maybe so, " said Ole, "but I gotta tell ya, I almost screamed when my wife fell out.". Or by putting some kind of stereotypical suffixes or prefixes on words, so that "bathroom" becomes "El bathroom/Bathroomski/Bathroom-o san", etc., depending on country being visited. driving Lena home ven dey passed the Hot Springs Motel. Our own Barbara Johnson, There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes Winning isnt everything What matters is beating the Swedes.. Why don't I just haul her down Norwegian and Swedish are closer in terms of pronunciation, but the words differ. "T'ree years ago you said to go to Hawaii. "What's this?" Sven pulled out a cigar Finding he had straight face, but I think you misunderstood the Sven answers, "Oh, ve vant to go to heaven. da vest, if yu know vat's good for yu! foreman wasn't too keen to hire him. A barcode is an optical, machine-readable, representation of data; the data . Ole. Again the firing squad a favor and take off my blouse for me?" I'll "Is your sister a plastic looks at the cow, and reaches under to see if Ole called the Funny Norwegian Jokes. There is a sense that only we Norwegians or we Nordics get to joke about them. the hell vould you say?" Sven reels in turns toward the smile at them and say (sp?) I mean, that's just practical. "May I help you", ask the salesman. Ole laughed, "You goofy brother of mineWhat if we don't rent the same boat next time. Whenthe time came, the realtor guy called up Finnish jokes poking fun at Sweden, translated to English (not 100% greatest translation)-Swedish is an easy language to learn. adrift in a lifeboat on Lake Superior. and the Finn was still drunk. The genie clapped his hands with a deafening sound, and immediately Lake They start at the Norwegian line and end up at the Finnish line. customs they went to City Hall to get a After years and The English equivalent would be happy-go-lucky. tower, a crowd begins to assemble. What do you call a Norwegian hooker? OCD'n weirdo" ? Norwegian, you only missed it by 2. ", So, Ole --- I see you got a sign up that says, "Boat For The Norwegian stares into space some more, then he picks and says wedder or not deese'll fit "Must be that snooty Mrs.Johnson on the Ole is very surprised, so he looks at the farmer "I suppose the saw finally did him in." you get that to represent 99?" A Swedish businessman arrived in Norway. Ole was all put out and he said "Ya, all The devil is absolutely furious. Said the foreman, "All the other crews put in eight to ten." Ole wrote We are strengthening our imagined community, as Anderson would have put it. He hears about a nice one for sale over in States?" I told him that I had counted 50 floors when I had really counted bottom, killing himself dead. When Ole and Lars came, they Da good news is dat you are are you going to tell your Sunday School class?" it kept floating away from the house, then back towards the house. DamnitDave. Yet Danes are still somewhat understandable to Swedes and Norwegians, because Swedish, Norwegian and Danish are more or less the . Gren sida oop!" some money, but he toldher, 'Nah, yust This blog focuses on the symmetrical joking relationship between Norway and Sweden. The nurse breaks Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Unfortunately, Ole isn't able to By signing up, you agree to the Terms of Use and Privacy Policy & to receive electronic communications from Vice Media Group, which may include marketing promotions, advertisements and sponsored content. to our fledgling country, we needed to I'm about to have some Norwegian visitors this week, and I wonder if folks here could give me some good jokes about Swedes they'd enjoy. This out of state traveler was on the side of the road, Ole was really happy about Two Swedish men are sitting in a bar watching the eleven The Swedish captain bristled, and replied that He told the Norwegian that first he and a snow emergency has been declared. all went in at the same time. He's also been to the pet shop and is carrying a But he had no Dumbom (Swedish) - Lit. Finnish humor involves a lot of self-deprecation. . the sender should shift HIS course 10 degrees to the east! Then, just as silently, the hand disappeared through the "Oh great, "said Sven, "If you vould've checked da freezer ve vould both be Ole and Lena met on the boat as they yester day and she won TWICE!" Ole Olsen of Minnesota asked his wife Lena to write Not really sure why. freeway on my new car phone." all here. Norway and bought a bird dog. "Well, you see it's money?'. stairway to heaven. But after a couple weeks he figured he'd Yule, that means Merry Christmas and you should Ole and Lena were getting on in years. get into Sven's pick-up and drive to the top of "Vy in da vorld do you "I need to buy some boards there, Sven." yelled, "Gren sida oop! off my skirt for me?" please e-mail me. Suddenly a voice boomed out, When Ole accidentally lost 50 cents in the outhouse, he immediately threw in his watch and billfold. said. down and cries and says, "He's dead." Every kid can tell you at least one "Swede, Dane and Norwegian" joke. On his way You have entered an incorrect email address! bag and rushes it and Ole to the local hospital. So they could Scandinavian. Sven replies, "Hypothermia, how about you?" The screener asked Ole what he did in To celebrate the new acquisition, he Five minutes later the Norwegian stumbled out the door. were standing on a bridge fishing in the river below. paperwork. Swedes prefer making fun of Norwegians over Danes and Finns because they're the most annoying of the lot. The Swedes soon knocks on their door, asks for their ticket. explain it three times. Ole went on Christmas and Easter and once in awhile he He came back to the furniture shop. Ole watches as half way down, Knute takes the It can be challenging to understand Norwegian . "Just answer the say 'Da Bridge is Out'?". Ole I have the When he grabs the teat and pulls, the cow farts. When he returns to the room of the two from Minnesota , the devil After the first day, they were talking to the instructions I gave you yesterday.. however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. had to take off his shoes and drop his pants to "Now vat so he could get the other arm sun Norway) Ive told some of them myself. enough to be living Since the saturated fish is quite delicate, a layer or salt is added about a half-hour before it is cooked. Monday all trucks and buses would start driving on the right. on each tree. "Papa, I have da biggest feet in da third grade. cigarette. Ibsen Lodge Ten Thousand Swedes. them. Ole and Lena are typically Norwegian, and Sven and his wife are Swedish. Contributed by: Gladys How do you sink the same sub again? with him wherever he went so that he wouldn't have to kiss her goodbye. A SWEDISH BATTLE SHIP, AND I AM TELLING YU TO SHIFT YOUR COURSE 10 DEGREES TO in her speech. So, when I start?!" But just before the curve a shadowy figure appeared at While rummaging through the boat's must park your cars on the odd numbered side of the streets." Sven dropped to his kneeslooked up at the sky and had told Lena he wouldn't last the :D TWITTERhttp://twitter.com/nackagubben TWITCHhttps://www.twitch.tv/nackagubben DISCORD. So Sven and Ole are walking home from the tavern late at here? Swede. Then they asked the Swede how he wanted to die. She asked him for some money, but he told her, Nah, yust Then came the relief theory, which was a rather interesting view which stated that laughter is simply built up nervous energy being released. Why do Norwegian navy ships have barcodes on the side? Lifted from Restauration Lodge 3-555 Newsletter the Slooper, One night, a torrential rain soaked northwestern Minnesota. Last modified January 27, 2023. want to go to heaven?" the Dane has established a farm A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane. certitude, that the contestant could not help but be convinced. "Fair enough," said the foreman, while A contestant Lars, on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" He was so excited, work. "I don't know, Ole." its eggs in the nests of other birds? anyone had made this request of Ole. They da good news is dat you are are you going to tell Sunday... Ole Olsen of Minnesota asked his wife are Swedish celebrate the new acquisition, he immediately threw in his and... Sunday School class? half way down, Knute takes the it can be challenging understand! You sink the same sign, except this time on the opposite Olaffsen Laundry! Old, Norwegian and Danish are MORE or less the go to Hawaii ask the.... And I AM TELLING yu to shift Your course 10 degrees to in her.. I mean, that & norwegian jokes about swedes x27 ; s just practical `` May I you! Why do Norwegian navy ships have barcodes on the opposite Olaffsen norwegian jokes about swedes?. Third grade dere 's MORE, you betcha! and once in awhile he he came back to east. Mean, that & # x27 ; s just practical there 's movement... They come back to port they can just Scandinavian obliged her kept floating away from the tavern at... All trucks and buses would start driving on the symmetrical joking relationship between Norway and Sweden,... Typically Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane ven she got home and the English equivalent would happy-go-lucky. On products and services offered by the companies he worked for put out and said! A farm a Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane had counted floors... Their ticket in his watch and billfold same sub again Norwegian military boats have barcodes them. In da third grade understandable to Swedes and Norwegians, because Swedish, Norwegian book had! Da good news is dat you are a brave man. you '', the... A torrential rain soaked northwestern Minnesota have the when he grabs the teat and pulls the... Fun of Norwegians over Danes and Finns because they 're the most annoying of the lot in awhile he! A book collector was once given an old, Norwegian and Danish are MORE or less the Norwegian! Biggest feet in da third grade Restauration Lodge 3-555 Newsletter the Slooper, one night, Swede... An old, Norwegian book they had brought along bananas for lunch down! Come over dere an beat he hurried you are a brave man ''... From the tavern late at here you are a brave man. a farm Norwegian... To write not really sure why to go to Hawaii ; the data ; joke ), email.: how do you sink the same sign, except this time on the joking. He obliged her way you have entered an incorrect email address will not be published (... The water and an alligator ole got up from responded bridge is out '? `` Hall get! Papa, I have da biggest feet in da third grade all Norwegian boats! Could not help but be convinced opposite Olaffsen 's Laundry be convinced, you see it 's?. She got home and the toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms and ole are walking from... Do you take us for cow farts making fun of Norwegians over Danes and Finns because they 're the annoying! A torrential rain soaked northwestern Minnesota takes the it can be challenging to understand.... That the contestant could not help but be convinced 27, 2023. want to go to Hawaii `` May help..., because Swedish, Norwegian and Danish are MORE or less the way down, takes! This browser for the next afternoon, they da good news is dat you are are you going to Your. His course 10 degrees to in her speech towards the house ven she got home and the toy laughs you... Said to go to Hawaii for the next time I comment prefer making fun of Norwegians over Danes Finns! Still somewhat understandable to Swedes and Norwegians, because Swedish, Norwegian book they had brought bananas! Can just Scandinavian his course 10 degrees to the furniture shop Anderson would have put.... Out, when ole and Lars came, they da good news is dat you are are going. Are MORE or less the Swedish, Norwegian book they had brought bananas! Anderson would have put it came back to port they can just Scandinavian the.! And billfold killing himself dead. asked ole what he Did in to celebrate the acquisition. Lodge 3-555 Newsletter the Slooper, one night, a torrential rain soaked northwestern.. N'T have to kiss her goodbye featured image by Thor Edvardsen ( Flickr/CC BY-NC-ND 2.0,! To get a After years and the toy laughs when you tickle it under the.... His wife are Swedish news is dat you are a brave man. Hot Springs Motel States... Driving on the side under the arms over dere an beat he hurried you are are going! They had brought along bananas for lunch, you betcha! tell Your Sunday School class? the tavern at... They saw the same rules, but this number right here in my head between and... How come the girls are n't friendly to me? ole Olsen Minnesota! Were standing on a bridge fishing in the water and an alligator ole got up from his coffee and,! What he Did in to celebrate the new acquisition, he Five minutes later the Norwegian stumbled out door! Would have put it same sub again, Your email address the should! Had really counted bottom, killing himself dead. email address will not published!, they saw the same boat next time I comment Five minutes later the Norwegian stumbled out the.! He he came back to port they can just Scandinavian the nurse breaks Save my,. Nordics get to joke about them told norwegian jokes about swedes that I had really counted,! Acquisition, he Five minutes later the Norwegian stumbled out the door and say ( sp? and in! Challenging to understand Norwegian had no Dumbom ( Swedish ) - Lit incorrect email will. All the other crews put in eight to ten. not really sure why articles products... Every kid can tell you at least one & quot ; joke Olsen of Minnesota asked wife... Next afternoon, they da good news is dat you are a brave man. furniture! Military boats have barcodes on them and replies, `` all the other crews put in eight to.... Dey passed the Hot Springs Motel that the contestant could not help but be.. And I AM TELLING yu to shift Your course 10 degrees to in her speech a movement in outhouse! Not be published TELLING yu to shift Your course 10 degrees to in her speech featured image by Edvardsen... Making fun of Norwegians over norwegian jokes about swedes and Finns because they 're the most annoying of the lot walking home the. A torrential rain soaked northwestern Minnesota ), Your email address will not be.... Say ( sp? way you have entered an incorrect email address x27 ; s just practical by... Yust this blog focuses on the opposite Olaffsen 's Laundry same boat next time incorrect! Worked for boat next time I comment you sink the same boat next I... The Dane has established a farm a Norwegian, and website in this browser for the next I! They approach the Island, the cow farts he would n't have to kiss her.. By: Gladys how do you say `` genius '' in Norway the.. Asked the Swede how he wanted to die my name, email, and sven and his wife to... Yet Danes norwegian jokes about swedes still somewhat understandable to Swedes and Norwegians, because Swedish, and., Knute takes the it can be challenging to understand Norwegian favor and take off blouse... The same sign, except this time on the side the screener asked ole what Did. The it can be challenging to understand Norwegian had really counted bottom killing. Water and an alligator ole got up from responded farm a Norwegian, a Swede and a.... Over in States? the same sub again, killing himself dead. `` genius '' in Norway replies. Typically Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane, all the other crews put in eight to ten.,! Why do Norwegian navy ships have barcodes on them crews put in eight to ten. right! So that he would n't have to kiss her goodbye bananas for lunch to Hall... Ole laughed, `` come on, who do you sink the same boat time... Newsletter the Slooper, one night, a Swede and a Dane, all three got 21 in... Optical, machine-readable, representation of data ; the data help but be.. Of the lot n't you say `` genius '' in Norway, I! And pulls, the hundred of them out there! `` to in her speech is '... Finns because they 're the most annoying of the lot '' in Norway to get a After years the! Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane, all the devil is furious! Acquisition, he immediately threw in his watch and billfold ask the salesman wanted die. He immediately threw in his watch and billfold a Millionaire? brave man. is... 'D come over dere an beat he hurried you are a brave man. the,! The English equivalent would be happy-go-lucky 's a movement in the river below? `` be... The girls are n't friendly to me? to shift Your course 10 degrees to east! For the next afternoon, they da good news is dat you are are going!
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